The Military Trap

[June]

I am in the National Guard, and I can't seem to make it through a drill weekend without giving in to smoke. I have conquered my everyday triggers, and the ones that only happen once in a while. But for some reason . . . I can't make it through a weekend once I put my uniform on. Maybe it's because I'm surrounded by smokers, or maybe it's because I can't run away from drill when I want to smoke, whatever the reason, drill weekends are especially difficult. Once the weekend is over, I can quit again, but I have to deal with THINKING about not smoking. It seems like every time my quit starts to get easier, there is drill to knock me back to square one. Are there any military members out there that have quit with words of wisdom for me?

[Giulia]

I have no military experience, so I can't help you with those words of experience wisdom, unfortunately. But let's see if we can come up with something here. Drill weekends are triggers. Not knowing what a drill weekend consists of, I'm gonna guess it's pretty rigorous. Are you feeling like you need a reward after all that hard work? And that there's a limit as to how strong you can be? In other words you feel like you're having to be disciplined enough during drills, adding being self disciplined in the non smoking department onto it is just too much? Is that any of your thought process?

Bottom line is you're still making excuses. My guess if it weren't drills it would be something else. Thinking about not smoking is par for the course when you first quit. EVERYBODY has to deal with those thoughts. Try this on for size. Make a pact to get through two drill weekends in a row without smoking. Just two.

Another thought - are there any other Guardsmen there who have quit smoking? Ask around. Seek them out. Find out how THEY did it. And don't hang with the smokers on the breaks. Is there a bulletin board or somewhere you could put up a notice that you're looking for other quitters?

Another thought - start a non-smoking group there - talk to your commander about it.

[June]

I'm sure you've heard the military is "Hurry up and wait". Sometimes I get frustrated and choose to smoke to remove myself from the situation for a moment. Other times it is out of boredom. Now that I think about it, the boredom trigger is pretty easy to overcome. I can take a deck of cards or a book with me to beat the breaks.

I think you are right about the level of discipline on top of my self-discipline to quit smoking. This is when I let frustration allow me to smoke. It seems like once I give in to one smoke, I give up for the weekend and continue smoking. I guess I could chew gum or coffee stirrers to help. Or just stop for a moment and think about why I am frustrated, and what I can do to help fix the problem. If I'm frustrated, chances are, other people are frustrated too. Perhaps I can find a way to complete whatever task we have in a better way, or at least find a way to make the work more fun.

I have told some of the people there I quit. My smoking friends are very considerate, and do their best to sneak off and smoke without telling me. This helps, but sometimes I can't avoid the smokers. I just need to stick to my guns, and be prepared for the next drill weekend.