The Stress Trap

[Giulia]

(photo credit)

You're going through a tough time. Could be a rough relationship, the death of a loved one, family feuds. You emotions are running rampant, you're feeling incredibly vulnerable and Nasty Nico is whispering sweetly in your ear "come on, come get me, I'll make you feel better, I'll soothe your hurt, calm you, take away your frustrations. Just go buy a pack. You won't smoke the whole thing, just enough to soothe you. It'll probably make you feel dizzy anyway and you won't like the taste any more...."

Yadda yadda yadda you're HOOKED. It's that simple.

[Dian]

I was just going through this yesterday because hubby pissed me off so much..........

BUT......... day 8, smoke free, I didn't give in........

[Jim]

Dian, I was in a trap like that yesterday with my daughter, I have tried real hard over the past three weeks and at times was doing great using the patch; but slipped up and now its time to try again. so I am going right back at it tonight.
Jim

[Giulia]

That's the idea, get right back on the horse. But why wait 'til tonight.......the more nicotine you put in your body, the harder it's gonna be. I say dump 'em now.

[Whimsy]

... and the next thing you know you blow a really fabulous quit! There honestly is no such thing as ONE. I even attempted the "well, I can just smoke 3 a day...after each meal" (this is after that ONE I had). What is so very sad is that that relapse happened well over a year ago and now I find myself dreading the whole process again. I was strong... However, the trigger won the battle. Lesson learned: One's quit is something to be treasured and always nurtured.

[Giulia]

"One's quit is something to be treasured and always nurtured."

You'd better believe it. One very great continuing motivating force for me to remain smoke free is that I dread the whole process of starting over again. THAT's enough to keep me free forever.

[Heather]

i think the same thing to myself "do i want to start all over again?" and that keeps me going....i'm 42 days smoke free and i still have difficult times....but there are a few things i tell myself and that is one "wanna start over"??

Absolutely not!

[Nancy Bond]

Whimsy: "One's quit is something to be treasured and always nurtured."

I think that is SO important! Non-smokers don't always "get" what an accomplishment it is to have not smoked for even one week -- it's HUGE. And we should wear it like a badge! Thanks for this reminder. :)

[Mike in @lanta]

Do we really feel that a cigarette can ease our stress or do we finally just get fed up with an irritating situation & say "screw it"? The mind is a powerful thing people. We can be the worst salesperson in the history of mankind but we can make ourselves believe anything we want. If you want to change your life, change your mind.

[polly]

You got it right on Mike!! LOL -- love your new look, by the way! I used the stress trap so many times during attempts to stop smoking. It always drew me right back in to the battle and of course, then who knows how many years would follow as a smoker. The fact is that smoking is a stimulant. It doesn't release stress, if anything it can heighten it. It's just another easy way out according to what our addiction feeds our thoughts with. We will always have stress in our lives. That's a given. That's a part of being imperfect human beings! The important thing is to learn how to deal with the stress and look at it as a valuable learning lesson. This is how we grow and nurture ourselves!! I feel much calmer now that I am not smoking!!

[Mike in @lanta]

Amen Sister! We will always have that stress & must learn how to deal with it.

But smoking is not only a stimulant. Smoking is whatever we have trained our minds for it to be. It's a stimulant, it's a relaxer, it helps me to think, it empties my mind, it makes me part of the crowd, it defines me as an individual, It's many drugs in one.

I hear people all the time talking about anxiety attacks since quitting. As far as I can tell I'm the only person that hasn't had an anxiety attack since I quit. I had been having them since I was a kid & learning to smoke. When I quit in 2004 the attacks stopped immediately.

[Giulia]

I've moved this post to the stress section.
Posted by angeleyes Aug. 24

stress is my biggest relapse and depression so im gonna need lots of help from everyone ! im ready to stop for good ! keep giving me my kick in the butt i need it

[Giulia]

We all go through stress all the time. Sad to say, but I don't know that there is a day that passes when I don't experience some kind of stress. It could be a child coming home late, a husband who is overbearing, a pet that didn't come in the night before, a friend in the hospital, a relative coming over that you don't much care for, a promise you've made that you'd rather not keep, a boss that wants 150% NOW, a too demanding wife, a perfection that we know we can achieve that we're not reaching. The list goes on and on and on. And on.

And the depression of failing to meet not only our own expectations of ourselves (perhaps mostly our own expectations), but those we suppose others expect of us. A parent whom we can never please, or a child whom we think we have failed, or a friend that we could have been better to or a spouse that wea treat worse than a stranger, a child that we have alienated because we didn't know how to simply say I love you. Essentially our depression I think is a feeling of a lack of the worthiness of the grace of our Savior. We know what we can do, and we don't do it.

This is life. This is our lives going on, day by day. It is not unique to the human species. But smoking is - for many of us. Many people go through these same experiences and don't light up under these same circumstances that compel us to do so. And it is simply because their brains have not be re-arranged, re-wired (due to the drugs in this little rolled up weed). They deal with life's stresses and depressions without smoking.

Bottom line...butt kicking....there are no excuses for lighting up. Stress or depression - don't matter. Millions go through those emotional realities and don't reach for a cigarette. When you've said NO to smoking. You mean NO. No matter what.